Coming Clean

Hi.

It is me, Bret. You know, the guy behind this blog.

I know you haven't seen me in awhile, so I thought it only right to sorta re-introduce myself. If you've read this at all in the past, you know that I've been horribly negligent about posting for the past handful of months, aside from little spurts here and there.

Like the road trip, for instance. It is easy to have things I can post about when on something like a road trip.

Day-to-day life, not so much.

It isn't that I don't have things to talk about. I do. I have shit-tons to talk about. But there's a difference between having things to talk about and being able to talk about them.

That's because Blogger, like Facebook, is a public forum. Shit you say on here is shit the world gets to know. If they wanna, that is. But ya know, there are some things a guy may not be ready to have the world know.

A guy such as me likes the world to think he's got his shit in order (at least most of the time). While I'm sure the infrequent -- or more accurately, non-existent -- posts were themselves a clue that perhaps my shit was in fact not in order, I didn't have to reveal the shit itself!

That's the beauty of silence, the sheer mystery that comes along with it.

But there also comes a time when a guy such as me is tired of carrying around the burden of silence. Secrets, while fun sometimes, become heavy heavy things the longer you carry them.

So as it made sense to do so, over time I've let those who's paths I cross most often know of the shit. Mind you, not of all of the shit. I just generally let on that there was shit, and that it was going on, as shit does.

Well dear world, the time has come where the guy such as me is ready to let you know of the shit too.

Lucky you.

So here it is: Jo-Anne and I have separated.

If we're Facebook friends, you may have already gotten a hint. The night of this post, my relationship status on Facebook changed to "It's complicated" when she changed it on her profile.

I'd let Jo-Anne know of my decision to move out before, but shortly after I returned from the L.A. new business trip (mid-September), we let the boys know what was happening and I moved my things shortly after that. I moved into a little (and I mean little) rental house about 4 blocks as the crow flies from our house. It was close enough that the boys could go back and forth on their bikes if they wanted, and I was still right where my life was. I could run and bike the same path, drive the same route to work, hit the same coffee shops, grocery store, and Blockbuster, etc.

I've been very proud of how everyone has handled the separation.

The boys have done well, Jo-Anne seems to been doing alright, and I have been doing well too. I've "nested" and made this tiny little house into my own, painting and decorating and fixing little stuff to be just how I like it. The vibe is really good, and the boys are here with me Wednesday evenings and every other weekend too. Everyone seems happier -- even Cecil (my cat).

It feels like I made the right decision.

Since moving out Jo-Anne has made her own decision too, and we are now getting divorced.

So yeah, that's the shit. Now that it is out there for the world to know, I should be very clear and say that I will NOT be dumping all the details out for the world to see. I am quite sensitive to what should and shouldn't be discussed in a forum such as this, and I have no intention of getting too personal or being inappropriate.

However, now that y'all know what's going on, I can actually start to talk about the things going on in my day-to-day life that would have made NO sense otherwise.

Like, I can take and put up pictures of the Little House and my Craigslist and Ikea -assisted decor. I can talk about whether I have or don't have the boys. I can talk about the frustrations and joys of living in a 530-something sq. ft. house, not having a dishwasher, and doing laundry with a washer and dryer right smack in my kitchen.

God, the freedom!

SO.

This site started as the chronicle of a weight loss plan, has chronicled road trips, rants, random stories and much much more. Now, it'll chronicle a divorce too, as much as is appropriate for me to share anyway.

It is crazy how life changes.